She'll only come out at night.....update

Cougar....Large solitary cat or a woman who’s attracted to men 8 years her junior..(Thanks Wikipedia)

At least 8 years younger than her, but what age difference really is acceptable?  Does it really matter anymore?  When we see the older man with the younger woman, this age difference is not at all important to observers in our society, but for some reason the other way round we nudge each other, point and whisper.

 

This term drives me completely nuts for a few reasons, I think it's sexist as there is not equivalent for a man in this role.  When I questioned a male friend of mine what the label was for an older guy going out with a much younger woman the humorous reply was 'lucky'...fair enough I thought.

The word 'cougar' still drives me crazy, a good friend believes that it is empowering.  She imagines the glorious large cat roaming the plains, independent and strong.  Which is all well and good until you picture the cute but very nervous prey shaking in the corner of a warren....hmmmm. (maybe she has something there ;))

So why do women get a label synonymous with a large predatory feline? Is it the age old thought that women in general shouldn't be overtly and expressively sexual?  Is it inappropriate still in this day and age for a woman to be predatory, to be the seducer?

Is this the need for this terminology?  To label sexually confident women doing things that a majority of society feel uncomfortable with?

I still really believe strongly that society in general feels really uncomfortable with overtly and expressively sexual women.  I think a lot of us (both men and women) don't feel ready for the woman to take on this role.  To label this, in such a tongue in cheek way, mocks it and compartmentalises it.  Enough for us to stand outside, look at it and observe it and judge it.  This bothers me because it effectively weakens the power of women and their sexuality by denying that women can behave 'like men'.  We can be sexually assertive and flirt and this does not mean that we're sluts or easy.

Can't we also be simply 'lucky' for having something pretty and shiny and fresh on our arm.

Not 'lucky' so much as successful, accomplished, intelligent, sexy and beautiful women who are most importantly confident of ourselves and what we want.  The feedback from 'said prey' was they preferred older women because (their words)'there was less drama, the conversation was more interesting, more honest, less game playing and know their way around a bedroom with unparalleled sexual confidence.'  I personally think successful sexuality is 60% confidence, 40% determination ;)

Well, when I'm roaming North America as a lone hunter ambushing potential prey, I'll have a think about this and get back to y'all.

Done and done.